Have you ever felt stifled, or held back when you want to say something in the moment, or do something different?
But, for some reason you feel you shouldn’t say it, or do the thing you want to?
The next thought is likely to be one where you imagine what the other person is going to say or do and you imagine being judged. You don’t say or do what you want to when all you’re really wanting to do is show up…
So, what holds us back? The underlying belief that you may be judged as a ‘show-off’.
What I‘ve found over the years of considering how humans act in different situations is that we allow ourselves be influenced by other people in various situations when all we really want to do is show up and feel good.
What is the difference between the two?
- acting arrogant
- putting people down.
- making others feel like they are less than who they.
- projecting your jealousies onto others (being jealous is just an imagined comparison of you wanting to be in someone else’s shoes and reality is that it’s not you. ).
- acting like you’re better than everyone else.
- acting from a place of insecurity.
- self critical about mistakes, failures, errors and when judged.
- lack of humility or vulnerability
Showing up on the other hand is all about:
- Being your best self when you speak and connect with other people.
- Being brave enough to face your fears IN THE MOMENT and come through them.
- Being authentic; being who you are:
- Understanding and embracing your own vulnerabilities, yet being strong enough to deal with them in the moment
- Aware of the importance of this pattern: failing and learning, failing and learning, failing and learning.
- Having fun, laughing and not taking yourself or others so seriously
- Having faith in yourself because you recognise the hardships you have come through
- You are being the example of your best potential.
- All it means is that you have got better at doing something which you have learnt how to do and now there is no going back.
So, what this comes down to is that whether we show up or show off, it’s only a matter of perception and nothing much more.
You see, one person may perceive you as showing off, when all you are doing is showing up. Perception is what you need to be aware of and is crucial to helping yourself show up.
When it comes down to it, life is all about being yourself and not living your life being affected by other peoples fears and projections, and not modelling their beliefs and ideas.
Be yourself, and no matter how challenging it is for you to show yourself how awesome you are, do it once, do it again, do it over and over and over until you become the very essence that you are deep down.
I’d love to read your comments below, how would you ideally like to show up in the world? What kind of things stop you?
Thanks for reading and as always, your dreams are part of your journey. Dare to make them come true!